Wisdom Wednesday: United States of America

The last few months leading up to last night’s presidential election have torn us apart as a country. Our differences of beliefs have been plastered all over social media, and the news. Politics has become a dirty dirty game. Non-Americans would probably see us as the Divided States of America.

Seeing my friends who don’t even know each other argue on my Facebook page really heightened this feeling. The feeling of separation.

But then I started thinking about the things that bring us together. And I remembered the things we have in common.

Like knowing all the lyrics to the Fresh Prince of Bel Air Intro:

Fresh Prince of Bel Air

Here are some other things we have in common:

  • Desire to give and receive love
  • Desire to be happy
  • Desire to succeed
  • Desire to be heard
  • Dreams for the future

And here are some bad things we have all experienced:

  • Pain
  • Suffering
  • Loss
  • Anger
  • Lonliness
  • Fear
  • Judgment
  • Disappointment

Life is too short to major on the minors. Or to focus on our differences. If you want to live your life like that, it’s up to you. But why not enjoy life? Why not celebrate each other’s accomplishments? Why not support those around us instead of tear them down?

I strongly believe in our freedoms–religion, politics, speech, etc. But I do not think that our differences should divide and separate! We need to learn how to accept that not everyone has the same beliefs. And instead of spending time fighting about arguments, why not talk about the things we have in common?

A House Divided

Have you ever been in a romantic relationship with someone who you agree with all the time, about everything? I find that incredibly impossible. Most people have disagreements and sometimes it’s everyday. But if you have love and respect for each other, you find a way to make it work.

All of us were raised in different cultures, with different surroundings, experiences, outlooks, and economical backgrounds. Therefore, we are going to have differing thoughts about politics. But just like in a marriage or dating relationship, we need to find a common bond so we don’t tear each other’s hair out!

We’re all living on the same piece of land (U.S. as a whole), going to the same stores, driving on the same roads. We’re all going to work or looking for work. We all have the same basic needs: food/shelter. So whether you want to admit it or not, the U.S. is like a big ol’ house. The only way we can build momentum and fix the broken parts is to come together, accept our differences and embrace our brothers and sisters–of all races, religions, creeds, etc.

I think it’s time for us to realize again and to show the world that we are:

The United States of America!



Wisdom Wednesday: Facebook Customized Posts

Let me start by saying–if you do not have a Facebook account, you will probably not find this post useful.

However, if you do, this may interest you.

Did you know you can choose who you share information with on Facebook?

I love that Facebook has so many customizations now on the the newsfeed / timeline layout. Here’s a tutorial on how to customize your readership/audience–which I use all the time to communicate with close friends, family or you can even post to yourself.

You have to be on a desktop to do this.

This is especially useful if you only want to share certain things with certain people and not everyone. Or if you know someone dislikes certain types of statuses, you can exclude them in your post. Or if someone only posts rude comments you can omit them from seeing your posts.

**Obviously Facebook is a public forum, so we should never think that what we post is private. However I do feel that there is a certain internet etiquette that we should consider. For example, if your friend posts everyday about how they’re tired of hearing about the election, you could omit them from your daily political posts. Otherwise, you may find them to no longer be on your friends list. I realize this is a touchy subject, but typically most of the people on my friends list are actual friends. So I normally try to apply the same etiquette on Facebook that I would in person.

To create custom groups, you can go here for instructions from Facebook: Customize Friend’s List.

Then to post to one specific list or to omit a list from your post, follow these steps:

What are some Internet / Facebook etiquette points that you feel should be followed?

Wisdom Wednesday: Dealing with Difficult People

Several years ago I attended a training session that was focused on dealing with difficult people. The primary goal was to help people learn how to deal with others in the work place or customers.

One of the surprising points that we learned was that the most difficult person we will ever deal with is ourselves.

The person staring back in the mirror.

Numero uno! Number one!

What the trainer, this fiery little lady, proceeded to explain is that we have difficulties with other people because we do not understand how we are uniquely different from every other person in the world. We had to learn about our personality so we could learn how to deal with other personalities.

The training class was extremely interesting and unlike most training or seminars where we sit there thinking about lunch, texting, googling, doodling, and trying to stay awake.

When we first walked into the classroom, there was a Q-Tip / Cotton Swab sitting at each person’s desk. We wondered for awhile what this would represent.


The fiery little lady explained that this Q-Tip would become more than a visual aid. It would help us deal with people for many years to come. She explained the Q-Tip was meant to remind us to:


Q. T. I. P. = Quit Taking It Personal

She was right!

Q.T.I.P. has helped me handle difficult people and difficult situations. Whether I encounter confrontation at work, home, church, or family, I constantly rehearse in my thoughts: Quit Taking It Personal!

We all have different life experiences.

We all have been hurt by others.

We all have different goals, passions, gifts, expressions.

We all have different buttons that get pushed.

We all have failures, disappointments and struggles.

Our outlooks, perspectives and expectations are completely different.

So the next time someone doesn’t behave the way you feel is appropriate remember the Q.T.I.P. principle and Quit Taking It Personal!

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Thank you everyone!


Wisdom Wednesday: Always Save

This is just a reminder that maybe had I read before this happened to me, it would have saved a lot pain, heartache and frustration.

First let me say this. I have worked with office documents for many years. I have done a lot of writing, editing, researching, and even training on how to use office applications. But yet, I still found myself in an extremely unpleasant predicament. It was no one else’s fault, but mine.

I was writing a research paper for college.

I had emailed myself some information on an attachment. When I opened the attachment, I just used the attachment to continue writing my paper.

At no point along the way did I save the paper until I got to the end.

I clicked “save as” so I could move it to a new folder, rename it and save it all at the same time. I typed in a new name, put it in my documents folder and hit ‘save.’

Then because I knew the email program I was using wouldn’t allow me to send it while it was open, I closed it.

This is where everything got really bad for me.

When I closed it, a dialogue box popped up asking me to save it again. But since I had already went through the save process, I clicked no.

What was I thinking?

I wasn’t thinking. I was in a hurry and trying to get it done and over.

When I opened my email and proceeded to attach the document, it didn’t exist. And since I hadn’t saved the update to the original file, all the work I had done was gone.

I had spent a combined 10 hours over several days. The document was over 1,500 words or about 8-10 pages. I had 6 sources with information.

I had an IT friend log in remotely to look for the info and another IT friend came over the next day and it was gone. Into some abyss.

My point in sharing this is to remind you the importance of saving your computer work.

But furthermore when we get used to something we start to take it for granted. Whether it be a loved one, co worker or piece of technology. When we lose our respect and attention to detail we lose out.

Make sure you save your work but more importantly save your relationships. Show respect. Don’t lose out on all the time and energy you put into building your life.


Wisdom Wednesday: In The Beginning

There is a saying that it’s not about your beginning but how you finish something that counts. Yet sometimes we have to think about the beginning. Especially when one door is closing and another is opening. As one season ends in our lives we will experience a new beginning.

My favorite quote of all time and what brings me continual inspiration to keep going and to not get stagnant says:

“There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”  –Anais Nin

What a great reminder to embrace growth. We become more beautiful. We take what we learned from the past and what was once flawed, becomes a stepping stone.

I not only feel inspiration when I read the following quote, but also cringe a little:

Source: modernhepburn.tumblr.com via Angie on Pinterest

New beginnings are exciting and also a little scary. Letting go is difficult. We may think we are losing control.


“Some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity.”
-Gilda Radner

If you are facing a change. Or if you want to make a change in your life, remember this:

“A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.”

What beginning are you facing in your life? What are some ways that keep you moving forward and embracing change?


(For my friend Mary)

Wisdom Wednesday: Safety 1st

My sister and I were discussing how we try to be safe by being aware of our surroundings. That probably has a lot to do with how we were raised. In particular, how my mother raised us.

My mom had some really bad things happen to her growing up, so it was her goal to protect us from having the same issues.

By doing so she instilled a little fear in us. My sister has an unusual fear of alligators. I think the fear I struggled with most was being unsure of myself and being easily intimidated. By the way, I think I’ve overcome in those areas, but I still have to work on it from time to time. People that know me personally probably don’t even know that because I’ve worked a lot.

But one of the good things about fear is that you pay more attention at certain times than maybe other people would. I’m super sensitive to what is going on around me. My sister said she is the same way. We feel like we think of things that other people don’t.

When it comes to planning something like a trip I will think of what could happen and am probably way over prepared. If I’m only gone for a couple days, I’ll take enough underwear for a week. Or if I’m sharing a room with someone I bring ear plugs for them because I snore.

My sister and I discussed last week some of the advice we’ve heard for being prepared. She mentioned that the Marine Corps tell wives who are at home while their husband is deployed, not to advertise that their husband is gone with bumper stickers or other outward signs. A would be criminal usually scopes out their prey and looks for signs of vulnerability.

If you think about it, what do you advertise to a criminal? Women especially need to be mindful. Is your car “girl-ified?” A single girl may have signs that she is single on her car and not even realize it. If you have something on your car, would you have it still if you shared the car with your boyfriend or husband?

Another good tip: Don’t advertise when you’re not home. On Facebook or other social sites–or even in person, it may be tempting to share where you’re going or who your with, but use caution and wisdom. A good friend of mine was burglarized when he went on a trip out of state. The biggest issue was that his friends and family knew he was out of town. Coincidence that it happened when he was gone? I’m not pointing the finger at anyone. I don’t know if they ever found out who it was but use wisdom when you share about being away from home.

Do you have any rules you follow to ensure personal safety? Please share in the comments section because you may think of something that others haven’t thought about.

Thanks again for reading,


Wisdom Wednesday: Pursuit of Passion

Life screams at me sometimes.

In the last two days I have had a recurring theme approach me through quotes and a conversation.

I wasn’t looking for quotes and I wasn’t looking for a theme, but when the same thought repeated itself, the dots began to connect. I went back and revisited the quotes and realized someone / something is trying to get through to me.

Whether you call these nudges God, your inner voice, intuition, the Universe or whatever, it stops being a coincidence after the first two thoughts (in my opinion).

Here are the quotes:
“Making a big life change is scary. But, know what’s even scarier? Regret. “ Seen on Pinterest, author unknown

“If you think adventure is dangerous, try routine. It is lethal.” Paulo Coelho, Writer

Those two quotes I happened upon through Pinterest.

“You can’t just sit there and wait for people to give you that golden dream, you’ve got to get out there and make it happen for yourself.” Diana Ross

“If you can’t find out your purpose, figure out your passion. For your passion will lead you right into your purpose.” Bishop T.D. Jakes.

The last two quotes were from a quote slideshow that was posted yesterday on Oprah’s facebook.

Here’s the link if you want to read all 17 life inspiring quotes: Quote Slideshow.

The final piece to this puzzle was a phone discussion I had with a friend. Since I’m sure he would not want to be named publicly, I’ll call him Ted. Ted was telling me how he’s been doing some deep soul searching lately. He said he’s been stuck in a rut, and he was living his life based on his circumstances and had begun to accept where he was in life. But he had a personal awakening and has decided to pursue his passions. He doesn’t want to just wake up one day and realize that his life has passed him by.  I explained that I have been feeling the same way, but that his conversation was a piece of a puzzle for me and my life.

All of the quotes and this conversation in one day was a little overwhelming, to be honest.

My life is YELLING. It is telling me to not just go with the flow. Don’t just settle for what I have. “Pursuing my passions” is not just a feel-good statement. It has become a theme in my heart that I can’t just let pass by. Today I choose to pursue my calling.

Wisdom is calling you and me to follow our dreams. Are we paying attention?

Wisdom Wednesday: Puppy Love

For today’s Wisdom Wednesday I’m featuring a story by my friend Nancy. Not only is her story sweet and cute, but there is an important lesson to be learned.

Take it away Nancy….

Her name is Khaki.  My 10 pound bundle of endless energy and unremitting joy.  The solution to our empty nest.  My new puppy.  My baby girl.

I found her on Petfinders.com and fell in love at first sight.  This is her on-line photo.  How could anyone resist this face?

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Wisdom Wednesday: Car Care

Can You Afford It?

Working at a used car dealership has taught me a lot about cars. I work in the office and handle payments and paperwork so I’m no expert on car repairs or mechanical issues.

Yesterday one of my bosses said “Can you Google the engine displacement for a 1955 Cadillac Coupe Deville?” I’ve been here for almost 2 years and I was thinking “I’ve never even heard of engine displacement!”

If you’re curious, the answer is: 5425 cm3 / 331.1 cui displacement. By the way, I have no idea what that means.

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